Dreams are only in the Mind

I just received a not-so-good news today. Crap. When the HR told me earlier that thing, I felt stressed out. It was something like, WTF do you want to transfer me down there? I am already having a good time in my place. Now I can't do my work properly. I don't know what I am going to do. My mind is scattered. I can't think straight. Everything seems so far away and my eyes are wandering to somewhere unknown. An unknown destination that keeps going and going. My body felt tired instantly. Lump as a sloth. Mind and body don't have coordination anymore. I played the song I listened to when I'm not myself. When I think things are not getting my way. I felt relaxed for a little bit but worry crept in again. I read career fortune in the net to calm myself with the positive outlooks. But the feeling is still there. I'm still on the stage of denial, anger, and bargaining. I gotta accept this reality ASAP cause it will only ruin me. I thought of writing down what I'm feeling. It took a slightly bit of courage to write because of the miscoordination of my brain and body. But I still need to express this morose feeling. Now I'm feeling a little bit well. Some negative energy are now released. I can breathe easily now. I am typing normally now while listening to a Bette Medler song. 

I want to slumber like a child again. Curling around the soft pillows and fluffy blanket. Slowly the eyelids closing and drifting off to sleep knowing that you are being loved and taken cared of. Comfortably at ease with the environment around you. The only problem that you'll be thinking is how will you cry when you get hungry and a glass of milk and a variety of good breakfast is ready to serve you.

I have woken up now. I almost had a good sleep, the comfy blankets and pillows I dream is a lumpy chair I am sitting on right now. The easy environment around me are the loud banging of doors from different rooms and shouting bastards along the hallways thinking that they can handle their lives. The good breakfast is just the idea that is eventually lost by just thinking of it. The person lacking of peso waiting for the next fifteen days will just be living with a 5 peso worth of coffee and a pack of crackers. 

You are now ready again to serve your masters. Another day same pacing in life. Dreams are still dreams rotting inside the idea of hope. You try to do something but it's all in the mind now waiting for the "opportunity". You work to get things your way but in the end you work for your masters to get things their way. Your opportunity is lost in the first place. The summer sunshine that we have been waiting for takes so long to come when in fact, the three seasons have been going on and on but no summer is approaching. It's just the same season over and over again.